promised blackpool

Well the hotel in blackpool wasn’t that bad, well I mean apart from the hair on the unchanged sheets, and the previous occupants toothpaste/shampoos etc still in the bathroom, or yeah and the fact that the room reeked of smoke, and I swear that I went to bed less smoky than I woke up despite spending the night in clubs.

Lets see, the evening began in the Blue Room, called so because, I’m assuming, the walls were blue. There we meet some more of Kate’s friends and had a chat while Eirin and I dodged the she-man on our way to the bar/toilet. I think she liked us… shudder… anyway interestingly enough I ordered a Vodka, Lime, Soda (I know at this point you’re going ‘and why would we care Ingrid?’) but you have to understand me, this was no ordinary lime, I do not know if it was radioactive, but it was flurescent, in fact it was not lime, but LIMMMMMMMEE!

We moved on to ‘Bar Red’, yes with Red walls, and I understood a little something more about English North-West culture. Despite their creative naming conventions, I can’t understand a drunk Blookpoolian to save my life. Honestly the amount of times I said ‘pardon’ you woud’ve thought I had a flatulence problem.

But the crowning moment for blackpool was the Karoke bar we ventured to afterwards. I know, I know, when it’s two am that’s probably not a good time to be hanging around with people you don’t understand but who are trying to convince you to do a solo act of ‘Do you come from a land down-under?’. But Alas, the Karoke had finished, but before we discovered this, and while everyone was looking in the song selection list for something more convincing than ‘Hey Mickey’ I saw:

1) one girl so drunk she fell over, flashed EVERYTHING and get up and start dancing
2) one domestic argument – beginning with the man abusing the woman until she cried, then the woman proceding to hit the man, scream and slap him so hard in the face his nose bled.
3) Same girl on the dance floor get so into ‘Sexual Healing’ that she pops out the other end of her dress too.
4) An awful lot of white lyra

Needless to say my estimation of Blackpool went up significantly. In case you can’t tell I’m being sarcastic.

But at least it makes a good story, and in a scary kind of way I had fun. Burgers on the way back to the hotel made everything better, and it wasn’t until next day when we were treated to a full English breakfast (Eirin had a hair in hers) that I remembered what made this place so special. The water glasses with our breakfast had a different ‘prefered position’ for each of the signs of the zodiac… Classy… oh and the guy at the table next to us, black eyed and bloody faced, downed another pint with his breakfast.

We headed of to the local amusement park, called ‘Paradise Beach’ and were approached by a man yelling strange things at us (I had to remind myself that I was catching a train to London that afternoon). He was the third person with blood caked on their face to try and talk to us. Nice.

The amusement park was fun though, and I was sad to leave Eirin and Kate, and Kate’s friends (my new friends) Kerry and Dean. I was back in London for the evening and Kristen made a fantastic lamb roast with veggies. I was also sad to leave her and Mike (that’s the thing with traveling you keep having to leave people) but I was heading back to France, and to Montpellier, and finally some warmer weather!